Category Archives: Uncategorized

Grief is the price we pay for love

Posted on December 20, 2023 by annwae

When you reach my age, a lot of your peers have lost someone. A parent, a spouse, a sibling; the only 2 certainties in life are death and taxes. As we age we attend more funerals than weddings and I … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | 5 Comments

Memories

Posted on July 30, 2023 by annwae

Every time I think I was a complete failure as a parent, I bat away that thought by recalling times when I think I was quite a special mum. It’s a rainy day today in Cornwall and I’m binge watching … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments

Accepting you will never know why

Posted on March 15, 2023 by annwae

I haven’t written this blog for ages but I sometimes I just feel I should share part of my journey as even though it has been 12 years this year, I experience something nearly every day that relates to Toby … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 10 Comments

Dear Toby

Posted on December 22, 2021 by annwae

34 years ago today I was in the Good Samaritan hospital in Phoenix where you had just been born. We never talked much about your dad, but I want you to know you were born with love and very much … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 9 Comments

Ten years…

Posted on July 10, 2021 by annwae

Ten years….. Waking up every day with an ache so deep in my soul I want to wail like a wounded animal Ten years without hearing your voice, your laugh, your Toby wisdom, your infectious laugh Ten years without hearing … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments

The me you can’t see

Posted on May 22, 2021 by annwae

Ten years…..ten years…..ten years without you, ten years of pain, ten years of trying to live my best life – without you. In many ways I cope well, everyone says I am so strong and an inspiration – but they … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 9 Comments

My top 5 reflections on surviving in times of crisis

Posted on October 15, 2020 by annwae

Now, more than ever, is a time of reflection. Millions of people around the world have had their lives shattered and turned upside down, out of the blue, with no warning and everything they thought was normal and safe has … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 6 Comments

Was I a complete failure as a parent?

Posted on January 22, 2019 by annwae

One of the traumas parents often face in the complex and tragic aftermath of losing a child to suicide, is the feeling of being a complete failure as a parent. We are supposed to protect them. From the time they … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 8 Comments

Letting go…..

Posted on January 21, 2019 by annwae

Today, 7 years and 6 months later, I’ve finally decided to throw out the shirt Toby was wearing when he died. It is so hard to let go of anything that reminds me of Toby, but the other day I … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

It will get better……

Posted on January 14, 2019 by annwae

I saw this today posted from The Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide in America. Having just heard from someone with a recent loss, I think this mostly describes how I feel. Time does not heal, the sadness never ends, you … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 3 Comments